Dear Grad School,
This is how I feel about you right now. You have taken over my life and I want it back. I think you are being very selfish with my time. Share me with my friends. They don’t particularly care for you either.
I realize I only need to write one more page and then I can feel like this. And I also realize that I probably could be done by now if I were typing in my paper instead of writing you this letter. But sometimes you just need to catch up on your correspondence, you know? And I was nervous that all the time I have been spending with you would have given you the wrong idea about my feelings toward you.
Please go away soon. Say, no later than March 1?