On a Break

So, the kitchen and I are on a break.  Do you remember how Ross and Rachel were on a break?  It is kind of like that.  But actually a lot different.

I don’t know what happened, but the kitchen seems to hate me.  I thought we were getting along well.  We were sharing, laughing, enjoying one another’s company, when out of the blue, THIS happened.

Pumpkin Truffle? I think not.

I should probably tell you that is a good one.  And none of them looked like this

What the Whole Foods recipe told me Pumpkin truffles would look like.

I could have recovered from this truffle fail if

A) it wasn’t happening on the heels of my Apple Pie Cupcakes Mental Breakdown Disaster of the previous week.

B) if my too-good-in-the-kitchen-sister-in-law hadn’t made it sound so easy when she passed the recipe along to me

C) if when I tried to go to Michael’s to get a candy mold (in efforts to stop trying to dip truffles but mold them into being instead) if the candy molds would have been in stock instead of sending me on a wild goose chase around the suburbs

D) if I hadn’t been on a deadline

E) if I hadn’t been making them to serve at a dinner party with strangers

F) if I hadn’t wasted an entire beautiful fall day failing in the kitchen. 

“What when wrong?” you might ask.  The answer is that after forming the pumpkin mixture into balls, when I tried to dip in in the white chocolate coating, the ball formation fell apart – melting into the white chocolate and creating a pumpkin-chocolate swirl.

I tried calling and leaving a desperate plea for help on Rachel’s voicemail.

I tried using candy molds instead of dipping.  That kind of worked.

I tried using a variety of fall colors of candy melts to disguise the ugly.

By the end I was so bitter that I threw away the rest of the pumpkin filling and baked pumpkin snickerdoodles instead.  

I served some ugly truffles to my sister and she said they tasted good.  So I took a deep breath, packed up both the ugly desserts and the potentially tasty cookies (and threw in some candy corn as a last resort back up), and headed out to my dinner party.

“Was it worth it?” you might ask.  The answer: No.  The other guests brought a dessert, so I never even took mine out of the bag. 

“Will you ever enter the kitchen again?” you might ask.  The answer: I tried last week to cook up some delicious broccoli for a dinner with my cousins.  The result: Nast.  I warned people not to eat the broccoli because it wasn’t good.  I said, “Eat the delicious bread that I made from scratch  bought at Panera instead.”

So people, it is official.  The kitchen and I are on a break.  If I ever try to re-enter, please stop me, and remind me to walk away.  I am still allowed to wear cute aprons, but only for fun – not for anything kitchen-related.


p.s.  You might be wondering what I did with the leftover questionable desserts.  The answer is four-fold: 1. I dropped some off at the g-parents.  2.I packaged them up in cute fall packaging and gifted them to a friend who told me she didn’t think I could be a train-wreck in the kitchen.  3. I served them at a baseball watching party.  Rachel giggled at each and every one she took out of the box.  4.  I served them to co-workers.

Yes, I am an awesome granddaughter, coworker, and friend 🙂

If you would like to prove you are the better baker, here is a link to the pumpkin truffle recipe, and here is a link to the pumpkin snickerdoodle cookies. Godspeed.