Spring Cleaning

Tonight, I am spring cleaning.  The theme is throw away or give away.

Because I hate putting my full attention toward any one task, I am also watching Community (if my little bro read this, I would tell him I am now 2 discs closer to returning it) and I will share with you some cleaning highlights.  Get excited.  Who doesn’t love a good cleaning tale??

  1. Cards from my 21st birthday.  They contain cryptic messages from my friends that I no longer understand.  Cards from my 17th and 18th birthdays.  Less cryptic.  More sweet.
  2. A  TV antennae.
  3. A letter from a fourth grade student who I had in a practicum experience.  She includes such nuggets as: Do you like the color I am writing with? and Please tell me if I spelled any words wrong in this.
  4. A threatening poem for me and my roommates senior year of college:
  5. Never Sleep.  Never Eat.
    Always watch.  Always look.
    I cannot be beat.
    For what you took
    is only my grace
    so let the games begin
    I’ll be winning this race.

    *We may have been in the middle of a prank war… it is hard to say for sure…

  6. An apology letter from a second grader that includes the poorly spelled line, “I apologize for calling you a bad, bad name.”  (I translated for you so you wouldn’t have to decifer atrocious second grade spelling) (I wish I remembered what bad, bad name he called me)
  7. A pirate themed apology letter from a friend complete with RRRRs throughout and burned edges of paper to give it that “I’m really from the age of pirates” look.
  8. The complimentary cards that came with my school pictures to give to authorities if I ever get lost.  I gave it to my roommate so she can look out for my well-being through 2012.
  9. On that note: my school pictures.  I will put them out on the year-end prize table at kindergarten.  the 5x7s usually go the fastest.
  10. Travel plans for Florida and Argentina: including pictures of Diego, so we’d recognize the guy picking us up from the airport.  Turns out we didn’t need it.  We just needed to look lost and confused.  And recognize a giant sign with an embarrassing picture of us on it
  11. An official transcript of 3 grad credits that will help me get a lane change sooner.  I’d wondered what I did with that.  Apparently I’ve had it since I lived in Maple Grove.  Glad I didn’t lose that sucker!
  12. Some books I’ve never read.  Some books I never need to read again.
  13. Did I mention dust yet?  because I probably should have had that up way higher in the list.
  14. A disposable camera from a bachelorette party 5 years ago.  I am mildly curious to see the pictures, but not curious enough to actually get it developed.
  15. My blockbuster membership card.  Does blockbuster still exist??
  16. During the course of this “cleaning” I have lost my dust rag at least 7 times.  This is not an exaggeration.  If I were exaggerating I would have said 102.
  17. An invitation to a former student’s birthday party with a special note written inside: P.S. Puts the clown starts at 6:00 Don’t be late.
  18. A letter from my BFF tourguide in Japan.  It ends with “FYI, [appendix]” and then proceeds to explain the small cell phone screen cleaner she sent as a Christmas gift.  They were all the rage in Japan.  I think I will start ending my correspondence with appendices instead of P.S.
  19. A “great effort” ribbon for the worst score at bowling.
Well, I’d have to say that my efforts, while nowhere near finished, are finished for tonight.
Things to look forward to this weekend:
a)  attempt #2 at Mother’s Day pedicures.  At this point it is looking like it will be fail #2
b)  gussying up my sister for the prom (I promise I will explain this later, because if you know my sister, you realize she is not 18).
c)  BBQ with my friends.  Including the cute baby pictured here
d)  I will probably continue cleaning at some point.  Most likely tomorrow.  And Sunday.
[appendix 2]
did you notice that I already am putting my new appendix resolve to work?  classy.